Creating Your Own Personal Growth Toolkit

When was the last time you checked in with yourself? Be honest. 

We experience endless amounts of change and growth constantly and, as the days pass us by it's easy to forget. But, creating an action plan, assessing my headspace and moving forward is becoming a higher priority in my life than ever before, and I want to make it yours too!!

Learning from our mistakes, concluding where we're currently at and taking stock of those feelings is powerful, as we strive to reach our full potential. There's no right or wrong time to partake in this reflective work, although I  feel that twice a year at minimum is a good habit to establish. Whether that's the beginning and end of each year, when the seasons change, at the start of each new quarter, or when you notice an unavoidable shift in your mindset. It's all about finding what works for you. And, having a handy little toolkit to pull out will allow you to find those actionable steps when the mood strikes...

Get to know yourself 

You've been living in your body for how ever many years, knowing yourself should be easy. But, that's not always true. We don't always notice changes within ourselves or know why they've come about. Our values might've changed within the past year, so might our priorities, relationships etc. It's not necessarily until we sit down with a warm cup of coffee and find some solitude to deeply think about ourselves that we realise truly what makes us us. For me getting to know myself is all about those values, but for you it might be about more, or you might not even know what your values are yet.

Ask yourself...who am I in this moment? What is important to me? What do I want short-term and long-term? Has that changed since I last checked-in and where do I go from here? What is my routine? What are my habits? What are some characteristics about myself that might never change? What are my strengths? What are my weaknesses? Allow yourself time to answer these questions. Jot them down in your journal or make a note in your phone and, reflect back in the months that follow.

Remember your WHY

Here's a biggie. What is your purpose? Your reason to rise everyday. These will relate to everything mentioned above. Your why represents who you are, the values you embody and possibly include things like your job or, your alignment to much greater issues within our current society.

My why is simple. I wake each morning to be a good human. To do what I can with what I have, to add value to those I encounter and, be there to support those I cherish most: my mum, my partner, his parents and a select group of friends. Another reason? I think there can be at least two...because I didn't come this far just to come this far - as Kim Kardashian would say. Past me in my early twenties would be unbelievably proud of the life I'm living now, managing my anxiety, living in this house with a boy. I can't stop now. The show must go on etc etc. 

Celebrate the small wins

Yes. All of the wins. Whether you woke up before your alarm, tidied the house, went for a walk, took a self care day, exercised for the first time this year or, booked that doctors appointment you've been avoiding. It's all progress to be acknowledged and to feel proud of. 

In June I sat down to talk about my small wins, but here's some more recent ones for you: 

• Listening to my body and having a couple of bed days.
• Walking to work more often even in bad weather.
• Switching up my diet for health and opting to cook more vegetarian meals.
• Setting time aside for coursework / training instead of panicking at the last second.

Own your mistakes

We can't be perfect all of the time, although I really really madly wish I could. The perfectionist, anxious person I am dictates that my mistakes are hugely embarrassing and must live with me forever. Some mistakes from almost 10 years ago still haunt my dreams, but what I'm able to conclude lately is that obviously they can't be undone. 

Now instead of feeling shameful and secretive, I talk about them openly. Here, with friends, and with anyone who will listen let's be truthful. You should too. Let that worry go and pick yourself back up. And, just for reference, here's some bits I've not been successful at this year:

• Misjudging someone's job role / overstepping in mine.
• Bleaching my hair twice and almost burning my scalp to death. 
• Misjudging how much I needed to buy on my last trip to the supermarket.
• Spelling mistakes. Across everything, all of the time. Amending them later and hoping that no one will ever notice.

I see now that yes, we all make mistakes but, no they don't have to define us. They don't make us rubbish life long friends, terrible employees or consumers. Incorrectly making my shopping list last week doesn't mean I'm useless and so, I will go to Morrisons again next weekend. You get the gist, right? Take responsibility for your mistakes, let go of the negative mindset telling you you're not aloud to fail and learn how to fix things in future.

Take breaks 

Despite in the past not always being able to recognise a burnout... or deciding to just power through anyway, I'm easily able to distinguish when it's time to step back these days. My anxious brain becomes fuzzy often, meaning that taking breaks is necessary for me more often than it might be for you and that's okay! Taking a break for whatever is causing me trouble means I can be a better partner, daughter, friend, colleague. 

However much it happens for you, please acknowledge it and rest. Whether you simply take the afternoon off, schedule an entire week or, assign yourself some time each month, just do it and thank me later. We're humans and can't function at max capacity all of the time. It's just not happening. Fact.

Whatever in life is causing you to feel less than good is what you need time away from, even just by temporarily hitting pause, so that you establish how you can make a change. You might not need to take a break from work but you might be overwhelmed with social media entirely or, a specific platform. You might need a break from certain relationships, or to literally exit your house and go on holiday. Regardless, embrace it. Stop. Shift that mindset and get back up when you're ready... if you're ready.

Listen to your inner voice

What's going on inside that head of yours? Is that inner voice calm or restless? 

Listen and acknowledge whether you're crying out for change, happy with the direction of your life currently, or seeking more - whether that's a better financial situation, a new job, a new home, new relationships or even saying goodbye to some old. Maybe it's even about living a less restrictive diet or, wanting to feel more well. Nothing has the ability to change unless we give ourselves the opportunity and, months from now when you decide to sit back down and evaluate your personal growth, possibly the worst thing for you might be remaining where you are currently, or even worse off because you didn't take that leap of faith when you were so crying out for it. 

But, let's turn it around too. By listening now, you might find that six months down the road your life could look entirely different, and how beautiful is that thought?! Six months ago for me, I had just begun my new job, I was nervous and over-emotional, yet so so desperate for good things and I could see them on the horizon. Now, I'm living it. Life is calm, I enjoy my work life balance and I'm out the other side of a terrible six months previous. 

Remember: This toolkit was originally designed with me in mind. Yours might look slightly different and that's totally okay. Wellness is the aspiration here and achieving that is different for us all. Be kind to yourself, practice some self love and live through the remaining of 2021 with your very own trusted toolkit by your side.