Leisurely reading Breathe magazine whilst drinking copious amounts of raspberry tea has truly inspired me in recent days. I've been thinking about how proud I am to open up and accept where I am today in terms of my mental health. Earlier this week I even surprised myself by writing an unembellished piece about my anxieties - the many triggers, my symptoms, and the journey. Today however, I'm reflecting through much more positive lenses, sharing how I plan my life to avoid those dreaded anxious thoughts where I can. I hope these little pearls of wisdom may somehow support you in managing as well...
Get yourself a calendar and take note of the days you're definitely unavailable
Personally, I used Google Docs to create an online calendar synced with my partners. Having a calendar I can access on the go instead of one that's stuck to my fridge is a necessity. Having the ability to whip out my phone and give a definite yes or no to whoever is asking for my time is perfect in avoiding any awkward cancellations later down the road.
I don't know about you but my working days are souly devoted to work and quiet evenings afterwards with my partner, with good food, tele and an early night. It's very rare that you'll find me making any other plans on these days because, I can only handle so much talking. I value calm moments where I can unwind and start fresh the next day with a solid 8 hours sleep. You might feel differently though, preferring be social during the week, and adore your weekend time for self care quiet time. It's all about accepting what works for you and creating boundaries around that.
Don't make yourself too busy
Busy isn't a desire of mine by any stretch of the imagination. By this I mean, It's extremely unlikely that I'll be attending two social events in one day. My brain gets frazzled when I have too much to do, so it's easier for me to spread my plans out.
What I really want to say here is - I love you, friends, if you're reading, but please don't ask me too much from me, and don't assume my calendar is empty because I'm choosing to spend my day in bed. Don't ask me to brunch and expect me to also attend that party or gig with you all on the same day. It's just not happening unless it's your birthday, or someone has died. However, if those two events are on separate days, then sure I'll be fully functioning and completely capable to make the effort.
In terms of work, I've learnt to spread out my workload and prioritise anything coming my way. For you this might mean not picking up more than a couple extra shifts a month, cramming all of your meetings into one day and, leaving the most important tasks until the very last minute. Don't make yourself busy every waking moment. Consider the hours you feel most productive and manage your diary around them for maximum optimization. Ask yourself these two questions - are you an early riser or a night owl? Do you prefer to work into the evening or get shit done before mid day? Basically, schedule your life where possible around when you feel most productive. Simple enough.
If you're a blogger gently take each day as it comes. Try to create somewhat of a schedule for content, but if that fails don't threat too much. Be kind to yourself and get writing when the mood strikes. Motivation can be found during the oddest of hours and your blog can be as flexible as you choose.
Leave room for spontaneity
Arguably here is where I address the most worthwhile of steps.
Of course, we all probably have more free time than we know what to do with right now, but that doesn't mean we need to pack out every minute of our day.
Don't stick to a rigid routine. Try to adjust your mindset and embrace flexibility where possible. There's something so joyful about having the freedom to choose. The freedom to say this day or this hour is entirely my own. There's nowhere I need to be right now and nothing that can't wait. I try to leave at least one day or a couple of evenings open every week, where I can decide to do as little as I want. On these days there's no pressure to do anything but take care of myself however I see fit. The important acknowledgment here is to understand that your time is yours and no one else's to dictate. So, just keep a little room to breathe. Maybe just an evening free like a Friday night for example, where you're able to ease yourself into the weekend, wine in hand, and relaxation on the brain.
I absolutely love having an electronic calendar, makes its so easy to know when you're actually free!
ReplyDeleteGreat post. I love planning and being organised. Not being too busy and leaving room for spontaneity are definitely important.
ReplyDeleteThese are definitely very good points to remember for everyone! Being busy is not something brag about, it means you're creating unnecessary stress for yourself or that you're doing something wrong. And leaving time for spontaneity is sooo important! That's when life happens and life is pretty good at the end of the day ;) As long as we just allow it to happen.
ReplyDeleteTeresa Maria | Outlandish Blog
The P word, is something I always struggle with, I like the online calendar idea, I might actually use a calendar if it’s on my phone.
ReplyDeleteAdam - http://daddoesautism.com
Unless someone has died 😂😂😂 love you
ReplyDeleteHaha, I'm just here to be honest!
DeleteThese are really great tips. Last year, when I finally managed to really control my anxiety, I found myself making more and more plans. Which was great at first but then some weeks I'd look at my calendar and feel dread because I was SO BUSY. Which, going from having like, no plans to being busy every day isn't great! So leaving that time for yourself is sooo important too!
ReplyDeleteJenny
http://www.jennyinneverland.com
Great post Kate! I love being organised and it's always good to leave that day or two for spontaneity! x
ReplyDeleteLucy | www.lucymary.co.uk
I never thought of the idea you could share electronic calendars - that's actually so genius! I think it's so important to make time for ourselves- I've definitely done this and it has helped me so much for my mental health because I know I come first.
ReplyDeleteClarissa
splasheswithfabulosity.blogspot.com